23rd Hangover - Why does this keep happening?

[hisnameisthecaptain]

[After being murdered horrifically, again, The Captain will spend the morning drinking the dead man’s hangover away. Sometime tonight, he sobers up and gives a call to the town.]

[[Phone | Unfiltered]]

“Hey, Mayfield.

Anyone else meet a psycho ☠☠☠☠ and end up dead?

Also, it’s not all that surprising anymore. Honestly, it’s not even ☠☠☠☠ scary. I’ve died all sorts of ways and been droned quite a bit. It’s just getting old.

So, to those of you who think your scary, ☠☠☠☠ off. You got nothing that hasn’t been done here before. Stop trying, and start doing something useful. Or sit back and pretend like you matter.”

[So, maybe not entirely sober. Still, The Captain is no longer impressed.]

Comments

[sting-like-a.livejournal.com]

Dying kinda stinks, huh?

[heartstar-blues.livejournal.com]

It's not a ☠☠☠☠ vacation but I've been through worse.

[sting-like-a.livejournal.com]

I guess so. Being killed was one of the more unpleasant things that's happened to me here, but... probably not the worst thing overall~

Oh, well. At least it's not permanent!

[heartstar-blues.livejournal.com]

Yeah, what got you?

[sting-like-a.livejournal.com]

My 'son' here. [Her voice goes a little flat.] Such a lovable child, he is~

[heartstar-blues.livejournal.com]

Who the ☠☠☠☠ is your kid? Mine is an awkward dork.

[sting-like-a.livejournal.com]

His name's Nagi -- he hates my hubby, so he hates me by association~ Nice house setup, huh? But my other kid is nice, at least!

[heartstar-blues.livejournal.com]

Nagi... yeah I don't know him.

Who is your other kid?

[sting-like-a.livejournal.com]

Well, whatever you do, don't get on his bad side! He's scrawny, but he can use freaky brain powers... I've watched him rough Ken up a few dozen times. [SIGH]

The other one's Relm! She's really... spirited~ Great girl; reminds me of someone from home.

[heartstar-blues.livejournal.com]

Wait? This kid roughed up Ken? I am going to stomp his....

Wait... who is your Husband?

[sting-like-a.livejournal.com]

Don't. Just... don't. He's not worth it.

My husband? Also Ken~

[heartstar-blues.livejournal.com]

So you're that girl Ken always talks about? Nice to meet ya.

[sting-like-a.livejournal.com]

If the girl he always talks about is cute, kickass, and named Miakis, then yes, that would be me! If not, I'm gonna have to have words with him~

Nice to meet you too, in any case! What's your name?

[heartstar-blues.livejournal.com]

Yeah, that's got to be you.

I'm The Captain. He might have mentioned me.

[sting-like-a.livejournal.com]

Good to know!

The Captain... The Captain... [thinkthinkthink] Hmmm, nope, never heard of you~

[heartstar-blues.livejournal.com]

Really? Well ☠☠☠☠.

That's alright.

You have fun sledding?

[sting-like-a.livejournal.com]

I did have fun! I'd never been sledding before~

[pause] Jeez, he's told you a lot, huh? Are you his dating mentor or something?

[heartstar-blues.livejournal.com]

Not really. He does his own thing. Also, supposedly the both of you are light weights.

[sting-like-a.livejournal.com]

I dunno about him, but I am definitely not a lightweight!

[heartstar-blues.livejournal.com]

Yeah, right. You think you could keep up?

[sting-like-a.livejournal.com]

I bet I could! I learned from the best~

[heartstar-blues.livejournal.com]

I don't know, I got years of experience kid.

[sting-like-a.livejournal.com]

So do I!

And I'm not a kid!

[heartstar-blues.livejournal.com]

I've been at this for about 10 years.

You got to be at least 18. So how old are you?

[sting-like-a.livejournal.com]

23! So... well, it hasn't been that long, but the Queen's Knights know how to hold their liquor, that's for sure!